G to the Grizzle, H to the Hizzle

Yesterday I missed my entry due to the fact I fell asleep early. It happens. Yesterday was a pretty solid afternoon let me tell you. I went to Tanasbourne and took pictures with Katie Reardon for our Leadership feature in the Yearbook. We had a good time with that, and I got some glass jars from Pier 1 Imports that I later used for my sweet gifts for people. I took this glass jars with cool little cork tops and filled them with sand I brought back from Mexico. I then printed out a little diddy I wrote up about the sand and where it came from and then added a corny, "now wherever you are, you take a little bit of paradise with you" or something to that extent. I then delivered these bad boys to people and for the most part, they weren't home. It was cool because their parents were nice and let me into their rooms so I could leave it with a note but honestly only like two of the people were home. So I think those people who weren't had a great little surprise when they got back.
Today was a pretty good day to the fact it was a friday. So today during lunch I went and sat next to Becky, she mentioned the fact that all three of the girls I liked/like and who don't reciprocate those feelings, were all in the same room. So I had Anneliese sit by me, making two of three within inches of me, then I hollered over to Christine, and she came over. So I made a triangle of non-reciprocation. I felt that something had to open up in the sky, or something because this is probably unheard of. After that I went home and played "The Sims" for three hours. That was extremely refreshing. I really enjoyed the time I spent there on the computer.
And now I am going to stop giving the daily events because no one gives a crap. The rest of the night was Nic jaegers party, during which I slept through a movie, avoided both groups that had formed because one was Nic playing guitar and I didn't care to sit there and listen to the same songs I had heard several times before. Its so weird, I think I ought to go into psychological studies or something because I enjoy watching people and how they interact with others. Like we had a group that I just mentioned that was Nic playing and everyone circling around like there was a concert going on. It was weird because he was the center of attention amongst a few people who also seem to constantly need to be in the spotlight. But everyone focused on Nic, they clapped at the end of songs, he asked if they wanted to hear another. He felt good for them paying attention and liking his stuff and they all seemed happy and content. Then on the other side of the house were the gossip kids. Everyone in that group talked about other people, mostly negatively and laughed about others and such. All the while I am in the far corner of the house in perfect viewing of both groups, alone. This is when everyone who gets up and walks around for a bit comes in and asks if I am alright. I appreciate their intentions but hearing, "Are you okay?" a thousand times gets old. If I felt like talking about anything that I wasn't okay about, I'd say so otherwise, I am just there. Its pretty easy to read me actually. If I am smiling excited I am having a blast. Otherwise I am either sleepy, or thinking, or both. I am rarely in a bad mood, just in non-social moods, and in that case, I am still okay. I am always okay. Even when I have a girl that tears me into two directions, I am still okay. Nothing in life is important enough to be upset about. Angry upset. Death is a good case of when its okay to be upset. Misfortune of others, like serious misfortune, disease, etc. thats also okay. But on everything else, its not a big deal. So to sum it up, if you feel like asking me if I am alright, know that the answer will never be "no". If you want to talk about it, ask me what i am thinking about, or whats going on. Even then I can't guarantee I will say anything. Its really hard to find times when I am really comfortable, and able, being able is very important, to talk about my thoughts, anxieties, etc. In that instance, the time will come, I will think about it enough to come up with a solid conversation points.
I do like to cuddle, if you are a girl and want to sit down and play with my hair and talk, I am pretty much always okay with that. Anneliese did that, well the hair thing, got to love that girl.
Also tonight Molly and I talked about stuff, but not about being sick, finally, but about other things. Good stuff like our recent immersions into the world of Glencoe's Drug world, and how we are feeling about all this new knowledge we have. That was good. I enjoyed that.
And on a side note: I need to stop liking the girls in High School. I won't find anyone for me here.