I'm like a Grapefruit....or a leaf that is turning

Today wasn't too bad at all. I did most of the homework that was due, and the stuff I didn't get done didn't affect anything. My back has been hurting ever since Friday, I want that to go away. I've been trying to pop it but it hasn't gone away.
I've got some kind of void that needs to be filled, but it can't really be. So there's that. I need to get hella busy because thinking will be the end of me. DAMIT!! I am not liking how things are working out with this crap. I've been kidding myself for months, even though I know its been there. Why?! This sucks really bad and I am giving up on everything. It's not worth it at all. So, things are going to change, I'm going to get busy, and hang out with other people and make my time enjoyable. I'm through. I will make the words of Ben Gibbard live, "She is beautiful, but she don't mean a thing to me"