The Wonderful Weekend

I went home this past weekend, the second time I've been back, and I had a really great time. I didn't get in to Hillsboro until around 6:30 Friday night, which was unfortunate, I'd like to have come home Thursday night with Scott and had a whole day more. But I went with it; we stopped by the Upton's house to drop Kate off and all of their stuff, but as it turned out they stayed there so I got a ride back home with B-dizzle grizzle. I unpacked my electronics and toothbrush, made the rounds, talking on the events of the past few weeks with Megan and Johnny Z then headed back over to the Upton's house after a quick dinner. It sounds bad, oh I left my family, and it might be considered so, but even so, it's nice to see the family's faces. The relationships we've formed have changed since I left, for the better; Megan and I are much closer than we ever were and I'm really pleased with that. I think my parent’s relationship has been maturing since the summer, especially with my dad. It's just nice to see them, it sort of feels like I'm an adult, which I suppose I technically am, but one who has his own place and just comes home for the occasional visit, to stay close and see the people he loves, basically like my brother Josh's situation.

I actually stopped by my grandparent’s house to see the reason for me return, my cousin Carter and his girlfriend Kym, but they weren't back from the airport yet. So I spent the rest of the evening over at the Upton's house, which is always nice. I believe that was the night little Annie decided to chew threw my Converse's shoelace. It's fantastic how comfortable that house is for me, two years in the making, and it feels like a second home. It actually felt like it after a few months, maybe several months, but definitely before the end of year one.

It's pouring down rain right now, and I love it. I despise crappy piddle rain, the light drizzle that soaks you to the bone but isn't enough to have fun in. With this rain I feel like going outside and running around the track as fast as I can until I collapse onto the grass and just lay there, letting the cold and the rain engulf my body. I'd lay there until I couldn't feel my body anymore then drag myself up and over to my dorm and take a long shower. A long warm shower.

But anyways, Saturday was next, I woke up somewhat late for breakfast at my grandparent’s house with the family, but I made it over there before everyone finished eating and ate with them. It was nice to see them, I can't even remember the last time I saw Carter, and Kym is really nice. We went over to Forest Grove for JJ's football game but what crap that turned out to be. The fields were completely drenched and with all the kids using them, they'd become mudpools, and the traffic from the parents and viewers made the sidelines equally muddy. Thing is, I had my converse on, which reminds me that Annie had yet to chew my shoelaces, and my nice jeans on, since I only brought two changes of clothes and didn't anticipate mudpools. Anyway, I didn't want to get dirty, I didn't wear dirty clothes, so I did my best to keep everything clean, I stayed on the track, a good fifteen feet from the field, and away from the mud. But I got tired of not being able to see and standing, so I went and sat in my grandparent’s chair, and it was all great. My shoes were relatively clean, and I had a good view. Then came the action; freaking kids and their football. The opposing team maneuvered a running play that went right by us, but Jeremy's team stopped them. Right in front of me. I was worried they'd run into the sidelines and get their muddy uniforms all over my clothes, luckily they fell down, but while falling down this stupid kid sprays a chunk of mud and I watch it as it flies across the gap and lands right on my shoe. I can't say I enjoyed that one bit, I don't mind mud, or getting dirty, when I have the right clothes on for it, not my nice shoes and pants. "Well it's your fault," some would say, but it wasn't, I didn't anticipate a mudpool, I figured I’d have safe clean cover. I got over it though, as I do with all things in life that are disappointing. And so after that I went over to the pharmacy for some lunch and to see Becky in action. That was pretty interesting, I don't know if it's a common occurrence for people to do it, but I felt like I was occupying her time, and keeping her from doing what she was. And when she came to the counter and talked, even though the "regulars" would talk all the time to the girls, it felt sort of strange bringing stuff up. Anyway, I enjoyed my time there, it was nice to see what she does, not like it's something I wouldn't be able to see by going in other times, but it was nice. She's pretty established already, if two months is already. Then I went over to Paulina’s house, and that was a lot of fun. I’m disappointed I didn’t get to know her earlier. She was going to be Edward Scissor hands for her family’s party so we worked on dying her jacket black, and while we waited for that process to happen, we talked, she played piano and I listened, and we set up for the party. I had imagined only staying a bit since her party was getting started, but after 2 hours or something it seemed too short, which is a good thing. But I enjoyed that, and afterwards I went over to my grandparent’s house for a big family dinner. And it was huge, 13 or so people. That was so much fun; Becky came over, and did well with my family. We realized the Zavertnik’s like to joke and tease a lot more than other families I know of, which can be really fun, and I love my family. I like kids a lot too, I was playing with my brothers, girlfriend’s daughter Alexandra and my cousin Jeremy and I have a blast. That was a good time, and then we went over to her grandparent’s house for a similar shindig. She has a rad extended family too; they are all so nice, and funny! Much different for sure, but way cool. Then we went to her house, and during the course of the next couple of hours I removed my glasses and left them in the study, only to later drive home, sleep and wake up realizing I didn’t have them. I don’t know what I was thinking, but I drove home, talked to the family, and did all my ish without being able to see clearly. And that was Saturday.

Then Sunday was amazing. I woke up just before her Church started and got over there in time to hear her sing, and listen to the president of Princeton something something give a sermon. I can’t really tell you much of what he was talking about, but he did have a really comforting voice, it was soft, and had an English accent. Then, I got my glasses, and it was refreshing to be able to see clearly, it’s also interesting on how alright I can see without them. The little bit of difference between fuzzy and clarity is so fine, but a big one. Then the same family as that of Saturday night’s dinner went out to eat at Canyon something in Beaverton. That was a lot of fun again and I got a sweater out of it too. Josh accidentally shrunk his sweet ace, really nice, Banana Republic sweater and the once large sweater now encompasses my small/medium frame in a very warm, very attractive bundle. Then, after grocery shopping with the family, another adult-feeling activity, like I was doing it for myself, I headed over and had Becky-time. Let me tell you, this weekend was the perfect combination of friends and family. I honestly can’t stop smiling. It was good. We went out to Padgett Road after making a few stops, and just hung out there in the cold, foggy evening and gazed at the distant hills. It was so pretty, I’m not even kidding, somehow without a sun a source of light shown through the fog and clouds and gave enough light for an amazing view. The large hills far in the distance disappeared as the fog consumed them and the occasional bare gnarled tree. It was gorgeous, and we talked and, of course, had good music playing; Coldplay then Death Cab. That could easily be classified as the best time I’ve had period.

Then I came back to this, good ole’ Eugene, Oregon. I can’t begin to say how much this weekend meant to me. It was calming and comforting and reassuring and satisfying, and everything; just the relationship with family being so good, the relationship with friends being so good, everything working out as perfect as it could. I’m so content, well, I could have stayed longer, or forever. That’d be ultimate.

I can't get my mind off of you

I carved a pumpkin tonight, two actually, with John and Kate at Barbara Joe's house. Barbara Joe is one of the nicest old ladies I've met; she's friends with the Upton's Grandma Lodan, another amazing old woman. That was a lot of fun, the one I took with me is a figure of a guy. That is probably the worst description ever, but it's about as good as it's going to get until I can get a picture of it, lit up hopefully. That pretty much took up most all of my night. It was so good to go to a comfortable house and eat home cooked food, and apple pie, that was delicious.

I don't think I'm doing too well in my classes. I just got back my Physics test and it said, 69%, but see, they didn't add correctly, I got 79%, which is not good either, but a lot better. I can't believe I got a C in my freaking Physics class! It's supposed to be super easy, why can't I ever do anything right? I hate that class and I want to rid myself of it very quickly. In Anthropology I've got a midterm tomorrow that I haven't really studied for, nor do I plan on studying for. All I can think about is going home, I want to be home. I wish I could have gone home tonight; I hate classes and don't want them anymore. I'll just go home and do something where I make lots of money. What am I really good at? Nothing practical, that’s for sure. I'm good at coasting through life without working. So if you ever need someone like that, I'm your man. Maybe you need an unreliable, lazy, kid to take up space, and that is when you call David Zavertnik.

I really don't even care though, I'd like to be better, I really would, but for now, I can only really think of being home, and that’s consuming everything else. I like to draw, but I'm not good enough to do anything. Think I could start a comic? I don't, I don't have any real characters I can draw well, nor am I witty enough to write a comic strip. I like photography but I couldn't get anywhere with that. I basically like arts, where does art get you though? You know what sounds really good to me? Studying art, everything art and getting good, and then getting a teaching degree. It seems like teaching is the cop-out. It's underpaid so I wouldn't get far. I need something that I can do and love.

Whats the point?

I don't even know why my Hall's flag football team shows up to our games, we're always going to get annihilated. We've played a total of three games, and in those three games we've lost a combined 96 to 13. Our team has zero organization and no real skills. The few players we have that have any experience do their best, but the majority of us have none. It's not that I really care, because I don't, I enjoy the people and it's fun to be around them; it can just get a bit ridiculous watching our team get stomped left and right. Our team could be really good, if we practiced, but because of everyone's schedules and lack of commitment we don't get that. We show up every Tuesday night to the field and play, that’s all we get.

Soccer is the same as far as practice, but somehow we're undefeated. The soccer team isn't coed, which doesn't really make a difference, except for the fact that the majority of us have experience with soccer. Our soccer team is great, we've got such good communication; we pass so well. The shooting part is what has us a little down, we've only got a few kids who really know how to play and they make the goals, the rest of us try but, like most inexperienced players would do I think, we kick it too high. It doesn't help that the goals are tiny, about 5 feet wide and 4 feet high. I had about four chances on Monday, nearly wide open, but A: I suck and kicked it high, and B: the goalie took up 75% of the goal.

I enjoy the fact I have a few things to keep me active, granted it's not nearly enough, but it's decent. I ought to go run everyday, or the other days that I don't have football or soccer. I also need to eat healthier. The past two days have been terrible. I've eaten like four square meals, 6 pop tarts (3 packages), an entire box of teddy grahams, oatmeal, maybe 70 oz of water, a few granola bars, frozen yogurt, and a york peppermint pattie. Cheez-it's too, I'm working on that box now. But that’s such a small amount of actual substance, the square meals and water are it. I need to eat fruit, I have watermelon everyday and that’s it, like two small slices. It's terrible, luckily I haven't gained much weight, if any, but it's not good! And sleep hasn't been very good either, although I did sleep through class today and got an extra 1.5 hours of sleep. I somehow need to get on top of stuff, school included. Right now I'm getting by, decent grades, I think, but it's something I should be working out, not just getting by.

All I can think about these days are unattainable things, I can't stop it either. I just imagine how much more fun it'd be if I could do x right now, or y in a few minutes. I don't think that's a good sign at all, if I can't be happy in real life, which I assume is what that'd mean, then that’s a giant problem. I shouldn't want anything more than I have in my life. Except bettering myself maybe, but I doubt anything I want could be classified, legitly, as bettering myself.

Christine and I came up with a good idea last night that correlates to that stuff above, if I chronicle all of my thoughts and wishes, dreams, etc. and then make a movie about them. In the movie I'd be dreaming about all of these things through my life, then I'd meet the girl and everything that I dreamed would come true. I'd live all of my hopes and dreams for the rest of my life with that special woman. I hope it could work out like that.

I decided something today in Art History, I like Romanticism. The buildings were the coolest then, a rejuvenation of the gothic style mixed with the new. I love gothic architecture, and the blend of it with everything else in the Romantic architecture is just cool. I'm definitely drawn to it, and if I had my way, I'd own a few of the estates. The English did something right for sure with that one.


Air is a good band, and when I have the thoughts I'm having, about being away with a love, doing something amazing it makes me happy. And now I'm going to read.

Sigur Ros is playing in my headphones

I've been quite productive today, at least in retrospect I've done a lot. I guess doing a lot doesn't constitute as being productive, but whatever, it's the word I chose.

So what has happened today:
* 3 Classes
* A few games of Halo
* 2 meals and lots of snacks
* Soccer Match
* Talked to friends
* Longboarded
* Got to know kids from the Hall
* Made some CD's
* Browsed the internet
* Began eHarmony personality profile. Why you ask? for my own pleasure and the results to tell me who I am in a nutshell.

Wow, those are all really weak, but I'll tell you, it feels good thinking about them. I'd say today was a good day, made up of lots of different things. I'm going to get some sleep, but thats what happened today, and I felt pretty good about it. Today was good, and I feel good.

I built you a home in my heart

My hands and feet are rough to the touch lately, and I don't quite know why. I can't see much of a change from here and home; I take showers as frequently, wash my hands as frequently, and don't participate in any hand-stressing activities. I really don't get it, maybe the soap in the bathrooms isn't as good as mine back home, or maybe the cooler weather is doing it, but really, I'm not in the cold that often, and usually my hands are one of the warmest part of my body. Then there are my feet, which just doesn't make any sense. It's even less likely to be any change from moving here, except perhaps the carpets where I walk barefoot/socked. They are hard and not nearly as nice as the soft carpets of home. Back to the hands though, I'm getting hangnails and cuts and crap too. I want to go get them all fixed and back to normal, but that'd: A. Cost money, B. Be a little weird since I'm a guy. I guess I can learn to deal, although it's not nearly as comfortable.

I've begun quite possible one of the most worthwhile projects for a music-lover to do, and that project is organizing all my music and cataloging it; artist, song, album, and album art. And so far it's going quite well; I've rid my library of all the songs that don't work, a good 2000 songs or so. And I've been working on replacing them with the copies on my iPod that actually work. I'm probably a quarter of the way done, I've still got to find the albums to some and the artwork for most all of them, but when I'm done it's going to be amazing.

I've taken up longboarding too. Despite the fact I don't own one; I’ve gone out nearly everyday on either Scott's or Ben's. They are a lot of fun, and I am seriously considering getting one. It's like I'm snowboarding but on pavement, and I have a lot more control of myself. I love it.

Overall this weekend has been a success. I relaxed quite a bit, enjoyed my moments of solitude, read for a change, and had a good time. See people, you don't need to party to enjoy yourself. Some may call me lame for staying inside most all the time, or longboarding by myself, or reading on a Saturday night, but I'll tell you, I liked it. Come to think of it, I don't I really socialized at all this weekend. I saw that movie on Friday night, that's socializing, but I kept to myself this weekend.

The book I'm reading is called, The tortilla curtain and it's a novel, so unlike the stupid Nisa, scientific journal, and all the lame textbooks, it's a good read. I really like it so far, and I'm really enjoying getting lost in it, I feel like I haven't done that in such a long time. It’s really refreshing to ball up on my bed, turn my music on quietly, and just let go of everything, join someone else’s world for a bit, see what different life is like. It’s sort of a two part story, it’s got an American family and a Mexican family’s separate stories going together throughout the whole book. I can’t remember what book it’s similar to in that regards, but it’ll stop after a section has been told about one family, and move to the other, to see how they react to the differences their lives bring them. So far the American dad is a man I’d be okay with becoming, partly. See, in the beginning he hits the Mexican dad, and has a similar reaction to one I’d have, but instead of driving him to a hospital like I would, he gives him twenty bucks and drives off. Thing is, he might have been on to something, not to say drive off if you hit someone, but the Mexican was illegal and therefore wouldn’t want to go to a hospital, they’d surely deport him. I couldn’t tell you what to do in that situation, but I’d say finding a way to check in on the guy would be a start. If I hit a guy I’d shit a brick. I’d definitely take them to a hospital, unfortunately I might just there ruin the guy. This book definitely sheds a different life onto illegal immigrants. Anyways, I like it, and would recommend it thus far. I got this from it, I like it a lot, "¿Adónde vas mi vida?" It means where are you going my life, but in the context I guess it meant, love. Anywho, I changed it, to "¿Adónde vas mi amor?" and now it's an away message of mine. I like it a lot.

I'm watching the visual effects on iTunes while I'm listening to "Plans," and let me tell you; it's amazing. It's impressive. Ooh! This now is cool; it's making a flower sort of pattern. Good work Apple and the creators of the visual effects.

Enough already

Today has its good points and bad points. Its good points: I went long boarding this afternoon and I enjoyed that. I went to the movies with a few kids from my dorm and their company was fun. The bad things were; boring classes, worst movie I've ever seen, and drunk kids all over the place.
The movie I saw tonight, "The History of Violence" was terrible. It was the most vulgar movie I've ever seen and shouldn't be rated at low. It was definitely NC-17, at least, maybe X. It had graphic sex scenes, graphic violence, and excessive language. No movie I have ever seen can compare. I actually feel a little sick to my stomach, maybe like throwing up. My brain also hurts, it feels cluttered and I need to clean that bad movie out. I can't even begin to put words to it. I miss the innocence of Hillsboro, at least my involvement in Hillsboro. I even sort of feel like crying, my body doesn't even know how to handle this, nor my mind for that matter. I looked around the Hall for Disney movies, hoping I could be caught up once again with innocence. It's not even really innocence I need; it's just a lack of violence. I've had too much today. On top of that movie Bud and Scott and I flipped through Big Boyz and they watched the accident videos. I can't handle all of this. I want to go back. I want to be comfortable, and rested.
Then there is the fact everyone around me is drunk. Not everyone, my friends from here aren't, but lots of the others are, and they're loud and acting stupid. So far their favorite phrase; "DUDE! I'm so drunk right now!" Why?! Boo.
I want to be back home, cuddled up watching a sweet movie, and falling asleep. That’s what I want.
But I'll take the good company. The car ride to and from the movie was fun. The people I rode with were fun and during the movie it was pretty funny being with them. The entire audience actually was pretty funny, everyone would just be like, "WTF! What is this?!" or "NO WAY!" And laugh at the crappy dialouge. I'm going to sleep, and try and sleep everything off. I'm taking it easy this weekend, maybe cleaning my room and studying. Like a good kid. I need that.

I am the king of procrastination

I am the king of procrastination as of late, two nights in a row. The first night, last night(Wednesday night) I started on my three page paper about gender roles and relations in the !Kung society, which was of course due the next day at ten. I think I ended up starting at 8:30, but I was talking to Becky online so I didn't get much of anything done for those four hours. Then she left and I worked on it for another hour and decided to sleep, at this time it's around 1:30. I haven't finished it though, so I have to wake up at 7 in order to finish it on time and revise it. I do wake up, and I do revise it, and I end up eating breakfast before class; something I don't even do when I get enough sleep. So that was a success, but I only had five and a half hours of sleep, so not a good thing to do. But I still have this other project due Friday I haven't started. This project is much bigger, I had to design a lecture hall, and draw the floor plan, cross section, and one view from each side of the building- there were four. I have all day though, at least three hours between classes then an entire night, but being the king of procrastination that I am I waited until 12 o'clock to start it. Now I'm done, over four hours later. the entire four hours of this creation were spent downstairs in the lounge by myself. Lesson learned? Hopefully, with five and a half hours of sleep and a little over four hours before class starts I might have an awful Friday morning, and afternoon. But hey, it's the weekend, it'll be fun. DZ OUT.

You'll be loved......

The following may be directly correlated to the fact that it's late at night and I'm tired, but I think there's a lot of truth in it. A lot. So here it is. [After thought: It’s a lot of complaining, the end is a good thing]
I'm unhappy. I'm not sad or depressed, just unhappy, mostly with myself. I let people down. I say something, with the best intentions of carrying it through, only to find out that I had either forgotten to do it or just not done it. A small example, but still very upsetting to myself are that of telling people I'd call and not doing it. I don't like breaking promises; it's my least favorite thing to do to people but I find myself in the situation constantly.
There is not an ounce of motivation in my body as far as I can tell. Just spurts of yearning quickly followed by defeat. I have not found a single thing in life that I have seriously cared about, people excluded. I do care about people, I care very much for people, but everything else in life isn't nearly as much so. And in fact, if I truly cared about people I wouldn't let them down. I'd be spending time with my family while I'm here, making them happy, and not letting them think I don't care. But there are other people I care deeply about and want badly to spend time with.
People aside for a moment, there are activities, skills, hobbies in life, yet none of which I have cared enough about. I dropped all the sports I've ever played, and even while in them I never truly cared enough to try hard. I always gave less than my potential and was okay with it. I don't have any skills; at least that are acquired. I've been blessed with some skills from birth, but I haven't worked at them, or hard enough to pick others up. Guitar for example, I've had my guitar for a few years now but I haven't actually become a good player yet. I've dabbled around, taken a few lessons, but I've never applied myself to becoming good. Not because I don't want to be good of course, I wish I was good. I wish a lot of things, but never turn them into reality. How could you be happy with yourself if you knew this? Especially when you know it but don't change it. I don't even know what to do with myself. Change it is pretty obvious but I don't know how. I don't know what I need to do to be happy. I can't think.
School sucks. I don't enjoy my classes; even fencing is more work than I care to be involved in. I haven't met many people that I see as friends. There are the kids that I've become acquainted with and can stop by and talk to, but I need new 'good friends.' I don't do anything at school; I go to classes, come home and play video games or veg about. I don't study; I'm getting really behind in several classes. I have no motivation to sit down and do homework. I'm screwing up so bad. I don't know what to do at all; I don't know how to make myself work. I can't concentrate on one thing, more specifically, one school/work related activity for very long.
Did I make some bad choices? Should I have gone somewhere that I'd have been excited to go? I don't know if it'd make a difference. Am I just immature? I'm 18, I could be a senior in High School still, but am I really going to let myself use that? I should physically be capable of this, mentally too. My classes aren't hard. They truly aren't, Physics is for idiots; I'm not having a hard time with that. It's keeping up with reading, or writing papers about stupid books.
There is a friendship, a good friendship, with a great person. All I want to do is be with her, go away and forget about everything that's stupid and boring. There is that. But it's unrealistic, I can't leave, I've got responsibilities.
I'm incredibly indecisive as well. Indecisive, unmotivated, bored, let down, and uncaring. Uncaring isn't a good work for it because I care about people, and that's what it'd usually be used to describe it. The way I mean it is that I don't care about things, again excluding people.
If I could I’d learn thing like they do in the Matrix. I could plug a program into my head and learn a skill. I’d want to learn everything and become knowledgeable in life. I have learned a few things about myself while being away to college and interacting with other people. One is that I don’t think anybody has the right to make someone else act or feel some way. That person can do what they wish. I also think most people’s motivations for doing things are ridiculous. One prominent motivation is to impress other people. I hate that. Kids try to act way too smart to impress others and their teachers. I’d much rather people talk precisely and make sense than to use foolish words to sound above other people. Kid’s lack of respect for things is amazing. I can’t believe the way people act, doing things just because they want to or can. Think for a second about everyone else that will be affected because of your stupid decisions. Respect other people. That’s a phrase I’d like to live with. I’ll make a shirt, it may just say, “respect others,” make it a bit cheaper to make. That can go with be open to because one person may be open, and other may disagree, but they ought to be respectful. Lets see for a second, sometimes is it fair to say respect others choices? In the situation of kids making bad decisions and ruining things I don’t think it works. I can’t respect people who don’t respect others. Maybe it’ll work like that.
I’ve got to write a paper by Thursday, take a test on Tuesday, another on Wednesday, turn a project in on Friday, and I haven’t started working on any of that.
I bought a jacket today and I love it. I’d like to go to the beach on a cold day and use it. I’d like to walk up and down the sandy slopes, taking pictures of the area, and be away from life for a bit. I’d then like to go to everywhere and anywhere and take pictures of it all. I need a digital camera for this, but as long as we’re talking about doing it, might as well pretend that I have one too. I’ll go back to what I said awhile ago, I ought to live in a dream-state, or live in a movie, and then I’d be capable of everything I want to be.

I’ve been complaining an awful lot lately, and looking sorry for myself. I had a wonderful day today. Becky, Megan, and I went shopping. I got that jacket and some gloves. In fact, I loved today. I loved it a bunch. I love being outside/shopping with cool people. I like the weather, and I like the leaves. I want to go on long walks through leaves this fall. I want to curl up under a blanket and watch movies more often too. Coming up more often, but without the driving would be nice. Let’s invent a teleportation device already.

I talk like a 4th grader

I've been doing the whole college seen for a week and a half, almost two and it's been pretty good. I've been attempting to meet people, that's been pretty neat. It's only hit the meeting stage though, no friendships have been made as of yet. Well, maybe Andrew, yes Andrew is a friend. People in the Hall are pretty cool. I'll be playing on a flag football team as well as an indoor soccer team soon, so that'll be exciting.

The food isn't half bad so I'm not complaining as far as that goes. I've figured out how often to eat and it turns out I have plenty of points to last me the entire week. In fact, I had something like 15 left over this week so I bought some cereal and starburst. I know I ought to be sitting down with new people as well, to get to know other people, but it's easier to sit by people I know, so I'll probably still be doing that.

Classes are pretty okay too. This fencing deal is rad. My physics class is far too easy, it's at a middle schoolers pace. Intro to Architecture is making me exciting to design but this paper that's due Friday is hard. Art history is teaching me a lot; I remember things from it for a change. I don't know what Anthropology is like yet. And that is my schedule. Not too difficult and so far not too much homework.

So that's basically the information part. I'm feeling pretty good about it here; the weather has been killing the good mood though. For the past three or four days it's been raining a lot, and cold. It poured a few times, and when you're walking around you can't help but think to be home in your warm house with the people you know.

Music has been a big deal for me here. It's what I use to escape, or changes my feelings on certain things. At night I've been listening to Coldplay and Death Cab and such, and it makes me think of all the things I associate them with. Garden State too. I feel so lazy and boring. I think pretty much all I've been doing is either chilling in my room on the computer or playing Halo against other kids in the Hall. That can be lots of fun but I feel I could be more productive, or at least should be more productive. I haven't quite grasped my homework load yet, or at least I don't feel like I have. I think I probably have a lot more and should be doing it most of the time instead of this other crap I'm doing.

I'm happy. Well, I'm not unhappy. It's fun here, things are fresh and new, and I worked out this morning. I ran for half an hour at a fast pace. If I do that, get on top of homework, and make new friends I'll be set. And get more warm clothes. I'm cold. I've been cold. Bad move. Bad move. I'm going to get warm. I'm feeling boring, I haven’t even thought about much lately.